Why are some evenings so given over to reflection?
I sit here at the computer and I read poetry, some
bringing me back to so many things past. And I
ponder on the years and wonder where they all
went. "Yesterday, when I was young," an old song
drifts thru my mind and I have to stop whatever I am
reading or doing, and I want to know when being
young went away? Yesterday? It seems like it was
just a day old, not years old. I can still see me when
I was a young and hell-raisin' kid. I can close my eyes
and see myself falling in love right out of high
school, and vowing to never love another as long
as I lived. Looking back, I fell in love a lot of times
after that, but that one stayed with me all these
years. He married, had children, watched them grow,
and give him grand and great grandchildren. He was
a great catch, too bad I didn't catch him way back then.
But, I never, ever forgot that first love.
I remember so many good times and good friends that
I had when I lived in Texas. I drove back down there
about twenty years later, and I went to all the old
places I used to go, and I looked for me. How sad a
feeling when I couldn't find me. One can never go
back and find their youth. The years cover them up
and hide them forever. Only memories of those great
times remain. It is the one thing that we hold onto with
the ferocity of a mother and her cubs. But, as the cubs
grow older, so do our memories, and our hold on them
is not as tight, and we fight to keep from letting them
go as they fade around the edges and grow dim.
I'll go back to reading poetry and hopefully, I can keep
my mind concentrated on them, but I doubt it. Those
wonderful old memories just wiggle their way back in
and I am again, lost in times past.
© By susi Taylor (Texaswishr@aol.com)