Bill planned to take her to dinner,
And he would spare no expense.
Being determined to win her,
This seemed to make perfect sense.

He phoned for a reservation,
At a fine spot by the sea.
A valentine’s celebration,
It was intended to be.

He hired a long limousine,
With driver in uniform.
She should be impressed to be seen
Arriving on her date’s arm.

They drank champagne in the back seat -
Too many glasses, in fact.
What she thought especially sweet
Was cheese and crackers he’d packed.

Bill bought her a corsage, as well,
Which set him back quite a bit.
The orchid had a subtle smell,
And her perfume wouldn’t quit.

But their driver started to sneeze,
While weaving from lane to lane,
Complaining of his allergies,
Saliva spraying like rain.

Shortly, a shrill siren sounded,
Police ordered them to stop.
The limo was then impounded,
When she threw up on a cop.

By cell phone, a cab did they call,
Sprawled by the side of the road.
Giggling, she said, "What a ball!"
As the limousine was towed.

Years later, they still reminisce,
About the way that they met;
And learn by a valentine kiss,
Dave’s allergies aren’t cured yet.

© By Richard McCusker (






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